Why Are Some Muslim Women Insecure?
I'm from the Islamic Republic of Iran, and I see a lot of strange things every day. Today, I want to write about one of them: rape is normal in Muslim families! Especially in old, traditional families.
We can’t simply say this problem comes only from Islamic culture, but I believe it plays the biggest role. There are other reasons too, but in this blog, we are briefly focusing on how Islamic culture affects it.
The issue is that many Muslim women in my country strongly believe what they were taught from childhood about their role in the family. Simply put, they are raised to think that a woman must serve and obey her husband. These beliefs come from traditions that might have been acceptable in that time and culture 1,400 years ago, but they are still followed today, even when they no longer make sense.
Some Quranic verses were actually good for women at that time. They made women’s lives easier and were a form of respect for them. And we need to admit that.
For example, look at these verses from the Quran:
Surah Al-Baqarah (Chapter 2: The Cow), Verse 2:187
"...They are clothing for you, and you are clothing for them..."
This metaphor emphasizes mutual support, comfort, and protection between spouses.
Surah Al-Baqarah (2:231)
"And when you divorce women and they have fulfilled their term, either keep them in an acceptable manner or release them in an acceptable manner. And do not keep them, intending harm, to transgress [against them]..."
This verse promotes fairness and discourages harm in marital relationships, even during separation.
These verses convey fairness and equality. But unfortunately, not all Islamic teachings are interpreted or implemented this way. for example:
Surah An-Nisa (4:34)
"Men are in charge of women by [right of] what Allah has given one over the other and what they spend [for maintenance] from their wealth...""...But those [wives] from whom you fear arrogance – [first] advise them; [then if they persist], forsake them in bed; and [finally], strike them [lightly]."
If you walk through most Muslim cities in Iran, like my city, Qom, you can feel the insecurity of women just by passing by. It’s really sad, and even as an outsider, it makes you uncomfortable.
I want to repeat this again: I’m talking about old, traditional Muslim families and their women. The new generation is better, but that fear still exists. It lingers, passed down to younger women, making them believe in the same outdated ideas.
I've often heard a story about my grandmother. My grandfather would constantly tell her, "Obey me, listen to me, do as I say!" He even falsely claimed that Imam Ali had said similar things to justify his control over her. After hearing this too many times, my grandmother finally lost her patience and insulted Imam Ali. The whole family, even the entire village, knew this story. And because of that one moment, she lost her respect—just for expressing her anger, which should have been her right.
Sadly, Islamic laws are completely unsuitable for today’s world. And because of their own rules, nobody can change them, question them, or even complain about them!
So, if you're unlucky enough to be born in a country with a Muslim culture, life is already hard. And if you're born a girl, your luck is even worse.
To be continued...